Stupid Smiling Eye
by smartasterisk
Summary: When looking back to her early childhood, Sakura began to seriously consider the possibility that whatever gods were up there did not give a shit about anything because it was a beautiful day in Konoha when the unthinkable struck. CRACK-SHIP: NO SHAME. Kakasaku Same Age AU
1. Chapter 1

**I've fallen for a crack-ship and I have no shame.**

 **I'm going to update A Double-Edged Blade soon, but I kept imagining a Kakashi and Sakura Same Age AU and I couldn't help myself**

 **This story is a guilty pleasure, and I hope you enjoy it as much as I enjoy writing it.**

 **I do not own the Naruto franchise; I merely play with the universe Masashi Kishimoto created. This non-cannon story, however, is all mine.**

* * *

 _When thinking back to her early childhood, Haruno Sakura began to seriously consider the possibility that whatever gods were up there did not give a shit about anything because it was a beautiful fall day in Konoha when the unthinkable struck._

Running on adrenaline and panic, a four-and-a-half-year-old Haruno Sakura barreled through the front doors of a calm Konoha Military Police Station with a nary a thought to etiquette.

"Where is Hatake KAKASHI!?"

The station froze in shock _because_ _how could a four-year-old possibly get through the Uchiha Compound Security without anyone noticing_ and then erupted with noise.

Haruno Sakura was by no means ordinary. Although she was born in the civilian sector of Konoha, a bastard of two reckless civilian teenagers, abandoned at an insignificant orphanage one overcast afternoon, Sakura was a certifiable _prodigy_.

She was crawling up walls using chakra before she was even six-months-old, running through the legs of caretakers before she had even turned three-months-old. The caretakers at the orphanage knew that they were out of their depth with Haruno Sakura. They were used to dealing with colicky and stubborn children, _civilian children_ ; not children who threw crackers at their heads with unerring accuracy from the _ceiling_ when they didn't want to go to bed.

So, Haruno Sakura was frequently tossed onto the busy streets of the civilian sector with the intention that she would burn off her energy on her own ( _or fall off a cliff, but the staff at the orphanage had no such luck)_ because no matter where they left Sakura, she always seemed to return to the orphanage when she got hungry.

Where she went off to in her free time, after unanimous agreement between the staff, did not concern the orphanage.

It just so happened that one day a wandering two-year-old Sakura met the few shinobi in Konoha who could sniff out someone with chakra control a mile away and stole their hearts when she threw rocks _with accuracy and force_ at their faces and screamed ' _stranger danger_ ' while they tried to pick her up.

The smitten shinobi followed Sakura back to the orphanage and quickly concluded ( _with the consent of the relieved caretakers_ ) that Sakura needed to be in a _shinobi_ orphanage rather than a civilian one.

And thus, Sakura began to properly train as a kunoichi at the ripe age of three, was thrown into the Academy at four where she glued herself to the side of one Hatake Kakashi who, as she would proudly announce to anyone who was within earshot, would be her best friend until the sun fell out of the sky.

Not that he had much of a choice.

Hatake Kakashi himself was not ordinary, but he at least came from a family where his talent could be explained; after all, his father's strength rivaled the Legendary Sannin on a good day.

Perhaps it was because they were both prodigies, and the same age, that they became friends; however, Sakura liked to think that they just meshed. Kakashi was inbred with the ability to dodge whatever Sakura threw when she was angry and Sakura was born with the innate talent of wrangling more than single-syllable sentences out of the boy.

They meshed and she _refused_ tobelieve it had anything to do with destiny that they became friends.

"Who let this girl into the – "

"How did she – "

"The walls are thirty feet high and _electrically lined_ – "

With her chest heaving, Sakura pooled chakra around her hands and clapped _with the volume of a bomb_ to catch the attention of every officer in the room.

Sakura took a deep breath and tried again.

"Where is Kakashi?"

An officer with an air of authority stepped forward and those behind him immediately quieted.

"And who might you be?"

Sakura felt her eye twitch at the _stupidity of it all_ and met the man's gaze with a hard one of her own.

"I am Haruno Sakura, and I am _Hatake Kakashi's best friend_ , please let me go to him."

The officers behind the man began to whisper again and Sakura noticed for the first time that they all looked sort of similar to each other.

"Well, Hatake-san is a bit busy at the moment. So, I would – "

"Look, _officer-san_ , I'm not going away even if you try to throw me out!"

The man, who she suddenly realized was rather tall and scary looking, grinned in a predatory fashion. He crouched so that they were face to face and responded in a sickly sweet voice, "Oh, well in that case, I ought to – "

"Uchiha-san, stand down!"

The officer in question stiffened considerably.

A taller, _scarier_ looking officer strode into the room. Sakura barely stopped herself from gulping because he was _scarytallthreatening_ but persisted because _Kakashi was back there_.

"Sir, I am sorry for causing trouble, but Hatake Kakashi is back there and I am his friend and – "

The man crossed his arms ( _who had arms the size of tree trunks anyways?!)_ and squinted down at her in obvious scrutiny.

"How did you hear about the suicide of Hatake Sakumo."

The world stopped.

 _It was this moment which made Haruno Sakura consider the possibility that the gods do not care._

"I-I just heard that Kakashi-kun was taken into custody and – and I ran here. I didn't hear about…"

Sakura had no idea that Kakashi's dad had – _oh god_.

The tall, scarier officer looked stricken.

"You didn't know – "

Panic flooded her system anew.

With a quick burst of chakra, Sakura leapt into the air and over the officer with every intention to find Kakashi and comfort him _because his father had just –_ until the officer, who obviously had shinobi training, grabbed her shoulders and brought her back to the ground. Sakura let out a cry of protest and fought against his grip.

The officers around her began to whisper again.

"Where's Kakashi?! Please take me to him – please!"

"Listen – "

"No – NO! Let me see him!"

"IF YOU WOULD CALM DOWN I'd bring you to him."

She stopped struggling.

The tall officer set her down and she tried not to cry because _Kakashi's dad had left him alone_ –

"Are you calm."

Sakura nodded.

"Good. You have to stay calm when you see Hatake-san because – "

She screwed her eyes shut to stifle her tears and whispered, " _please_ take me to him."

The officer looked as if this was the last thing he wanted to deal with because _it probably was_ and ran his hand down his face.

"Alright, let's go."

He offered his hand to Sakura and she took it her own trembling one. The officer led them through the silent front room of the station into a long, sterile looking hallway full of secure-looking wooden doors where they walked, and walked, and walked, and Sakura was absolutely certain that no hallway could be _this long_ , but was drawn from her thoughts when they finally came to a stop. The officer let his hand rest on a rusted doorknob a moment before the door swung open with a _pop_.

The officer ushered her inside and swung the door shut behind her.

The room was as sterile looking as the hallway and Sakura almost let herself be drawn into the curiosity that was the Konoha Military Police Station – no – _Compound_ before she noticed Kakashi silently huddled in the corner of the room.

She took a few steps towards him, slow at first but gradually gaining in speed, until she slid onto her knees and embraced the boy on the floor.

"Sakur – "

She quickly pulled back and cradled his face in her hands. His eyes were rimmed in red, there were tear stains on his mask, and he was looked as if he was trying to compose himself, _and_ _her heart couldn't take it_.

"Are you okay, Kashi-kun _?_ "

He nodded, but she noticed that his eyes looked a little glassy and she hugged the boy _tight._

"You don't need to be, baka."

Sakura felt Kakashi nod against her shoulder and then let out a hiccupping sob _._

She held him all the tighter and let him cry.

 _The gods couldn't care – there was no way they would let something like this happen if they did._

Sakura didn't know how long they were in that position, but she knew when the scarier looking officer opened the door her knees were aching.

The officer looked over the two and then nodded to someone out of sight. Sakura maneuvered herself to Kakashi's left side and slid her arm around his shoulder. She didn't know who had been asking Kakashi questions and if they were nice, so her free hand hovered over her shuriken bolster _just in case_.

The man who walked in had kind eyes and long, blonde hair. He smiled at her as if trying to prove that he was a non-threat and then, in a soft voice, he asked Kakashi: "I see you've got a friend with you."

Sakura was too emotionally exhausted to restrain herself from rolling her eyes because she _had_ been yelling that to the officers at the front of the station.

Kakashi, however, stiffened and slipped his left arm around her waist.

The officer at the door answered in a gruff voice when Kakashi remained silent, "Haruno-san wanted to make sure that Hatake-san was okay."

The man with kind eyes smiled a bit in understanding at the two and then crouched so they were eye-to-eye.

"Haruno-san, I'm afraid that Hatake-san has to stay at the station for a bit longer before he can go home. I would recommend coming back tomorrow when he can – "

"I'm okay here."

And if the steely grip Kakashi had on her shirt was any indication, he wasn't going to let her go for quite a while as well.

The man's eyes flickered with something that made the hairs on the back of her neck rise. _Non-threat, my ass_ ,she thought.

"I must insist."

Sakura could barely keep from growling when she ground out, "as do I."

The officer at the door chuckled and the man with blonde hair shot a glare in his direction.

"Well, you must understand that – "

"Sorry, blonde-san, but I don't care."

The officer at the door let out a loud guffaw and the blonde man glowered at her.

"Now listen here, you little brat, we let you see Hatake-san. We can easily take away that privilege if you aren't respectful."

Kakashi gripped her shirt a little tighter and Sakura let blue chakra curl around her first. Then, she _grinned_.

"I'd like to see you try."

The blonde man gaped at her obvious threat and the officer at the door bent over laughing.

"Inoichi, I think we'd better let the little lady stay for a bit longer."

Sakura loosened her grip on Kakashi a tad and felt Kakashi's shoulders relax.

The blonde man, Inoichi, grumbled to himself and then sighed.

"Yeah, yeah. I guess."

Inoichi slumped his shoulders and looked back at the two of them, "you two don't make anything easy, do you?"

Sakura felt like he was referencing something specific, but she didn't ask about it.

The blonde man stood, and with the wave of his hand, added, "we'll bring you two bed mats for the night."

She nodded and finally relaxed.

Inoichi left the room, sparing no backwards glance at them. The officer shut the door behind himself after a moment of silence, leaving the two alone.

Sakura let her head fall against Kakashi's shoulder sighed, "have they been this annoying the entire time?"

He let out a soft huff, "I think that we're more annoying than they are."

His voice was rough from crying, but she didn't mention it. Instead, Sakura grinned and nudged his shoulder. When he let out a chuckle her heart _soared_.

"I think you're right about that."

She drew back her arm so she could weave her fingers through his right hand.

"Kashi-kun, you're my best friend."

She tightened her hold on his hand and swallowed hard before continuing, "you can punch me and call me names but I'm not leaving. The sun'll have to burn out before I do that."

She didn't dare look at him, not when she felt raw and weak.

Kakashi sniffed and didn't say anything more but his grip on her hand and shirt tightened and she supposed that was as much acknowledgement as she was going to get from him.

The two stayed in the station for the night, and in the morning the officers had to discuss the logistics that followed Sakumo's suicide with Kakashi. Sakura stayed as support, much to the scarier officer's amusement.

"Your house is cleaned, so if you wish to return there you can."

Sakura stiffened, _there is no way Kakashi is going to stay in the house where his father –_

"That sounds goo –"

"If it sounds appealing to Kashi-kun, he can stay at the House for Academy Students until he can buy an apartment?"

The officer sent an indiscernible look at her and for a moment she thought that she had really stuck her foot in her mouth.

"I – I mean, it's an option, and it's loud and fun…" _and he wouldn't be alone._

She looked down at her hands and felt her face flush.

"Actually, that sounds a bit better. Is that okay, officer-san?"

Sakura looked at Kakashi in shock. His profile didn't give away what he was feeling.

"That can certainly be arranged. The house will remain under your name unless you do anything with it, and you can access your possessions at – "

She let out a sigh of relief, but Kakashi drew her out of her thoughts.

"Thank you, officer-san. How early can I move into the House?"

The officer tapped his chin in thought, "arrangements, if started now, could be finished before noon and your possessions can be picked up at any time, from the house or from storage."

Kakashi nodded and drew a breath before asking the officer, "will I have to arrange the funeral?"

"No, your father already had arrangements. If this Tuesday works for you, that is the quickest it can be done."

He nodded sharply, "that works. Can I leave?"

"Yes, Hatake-san. The House will be expecting you around one this afternoon."

The officer stood and both Kakashi and Sakura followed suit.

Kakashi bowed and the officer led them out of the room and the station.

After a few more goodbyes and take-cares, the two aimlessly headed for the main gate of the Uchiha Compound.

Silence reigned for a few moments and Sakura's mind was spinning – _because who would let an emotional four-year-old go out on their own with no supervision after their father had just –_

"Sakura-chan."

Blinking owlishly, she turned to Kakashi who was looking at her with a determined expression.

"Yeah?"

"Best friends forever?"

She blinked again, this time in confusion.

"Of course?! Didn't I say that earlier?"

He nodded and the two continued on.

She felt his fingers tangle with hers and let him grip her hand. This brought them shoulder to shoulder and Sakura didn't need to look at him to know that he was getting emotional.

"'Till the sun burns out, Hatake. Don't forget it."

She knew that it sounded like false bravado, but Kakashi gripped her hand all the tighter so she took it was a small victory.

"I- I think we have to stop at my house to get the stuff for the House and – "

Sakura nodded and listened to his babbling until it ran out.

"Want to go get it now and then get some lunch?"

"Yeah."

"Well, good. My treat this time, okay?"

"Yeah."

"- _and_ , you have to let me organize your socks."

"My _socks?_ "

"Yeah! You have the worst sock organization of anyone I've ever met."

"Sock organization – who organizes their socks?"

"Well, me! And I'll tell you – "

The two bickered and Sakura mentally patted herself on the back for distracting him.

Although it didn't last long. As soon as the two made their way out of the compound and into the village Kakashi began to garner pitiful and sympathetic glances. His grip on her hand tightened so much that it hurt but she didn't dare let go.

"Kashi-kun, want to race to your place?"

He looked up at her so quickly that she was sure that he had to have whiplash. She stopped and cocked her hip, "– or do you think you can't beat me?"

His eyes squinted in a telltale smile and then he was gone.

Sakura let out a laugh and then vanished as well.

With the speed they were going, it took less than three minutes to reach the Hatake residence. Once the two reached the small house on the edge of the forest, Sakura took his hand in hers and glanced over at the boy.

He seemed tired, small, _sad_.

"Are you sure you wanna do this now?"

Kakashi nodded, "I think, if I don't do this now. I won't –" _be able to do this later._

And with that, the two walked to the house.

The front door was unlocked, and the first thing that Sakura noticed when they walked into the house was that it smelt of bleach.

Kakashi didn't pause to consider the house. Instead, he let go of her hand and hurried into his room.

She trailed along with him and paused at the doorframe as he pulled out a bag from under his bed and began throwing clothes and supplies haphazardly into the box.

With the effort Kakashi was exerting trying to gather his belongings, he almost began panting.

His room was bigger than she expected, with posters of faraway places plastering the walls and a dog stuffed animal sitting on the shelf. Sakura walked to the shelf and pulled down the plushy. It was soft and worn and old.

"Okay, I'm done."

She heard him toss his bag over his shoulder and turned around, his toy still in her hands.

"Okay."

His eyes were drawn to the dog in her grip.

"Sorry, I – ah."

"No – it's okay. Could you put it in my bag, actually?"

She nodded and went to work unzipping his bag and stuffing the small plushy in with the rest of his belongings.

"Did you get all of your socks?"

"Gosh – Sakura-can, why are you so obsessed with socks? I don't even wear socks most of the time."

"It never hurts to have your socks organized!"

When she finished zipping her bag, Kakashi almost _sprinted_ to the front of the house to escape her relentless attack on his sock organization.

"I've stopped listening to you."

"You can never be too organized, Kashi-kun!"

They had made it out of the house, still bickering, when Kakashi suddenly asked, "race you to Ichiraku's?"

Sakura felt her face split with her smile.

"You've got it, slowpoke."

And the two were off.

* * *

 **Okay, I'm trying out a different writing style so tell me what you think!**

 **Thanks for reading ^-^**


	2. Chapter 2

Hello folks,

It's been awhile - I plan to start uploading again. I'll start by rewriting/updating some of my old stories while writing new chapters. I am also planning on writing new stories as well, so I'll try and upload as much as possible in the next few weeks.


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